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Best of QueerSighted

Check out these fabulous blog posts:

The Idiot's Guide to Coming Out to Your Parents

10 Things I Learned At a Lesbian 4th of July BBQ

Old Gay Coots Have Something to Say, Dagnabbit!

Don't forget to check out the fabulous gay gallery page!

Pausing and poising

Dear Queersighted readers,

As a voracious blog reader myself, I know that when the daily flow stops for any reason, it can be painfully disappointing. I speak for everyone in AOL community programming, and the blog creation teams, when I say sorry for the interruption of Queersighted! There is good news here: this interruption is just a pause, and Queersighted will return to full-fledged bloggy production soon. The exact timeline isn't firm yet, but please stay tuned.

Brad Hill
Programming Director, Weblogs/AOL

There's No Place Like Homo

I have always envied people who seemed to know where they belonged. I've had more addresses and phone numbers than Republicans have sex scandals. Change has always been exciting to me; an opportunity, a carnival ride, an adventure. An old friend of mine once said, "The greatest challenge associated with aging is not morbidity and mortality; it's novelty. More precisely it's the hunger for novelty, a hunger that grows increasingly difficult to satisfy." And no, that wasn't a quote from Portia de Rossi. She's not old. That was my friend Richard "the lionhearted" Rothstein.

I don't know if Ellen and Portia are breaking up, but I do know that menopause is not what makes couples stop having sex. I know this because I went for a long time without sex and it had nothing to do with wrestling the menopause. It had to do with being in a bad relationship. The other thing I know is that this is my last post on Queersighted. Oh well, change happens. Sometimes we choose change and sometimes change chooses us. Either way, change is opportunity and opportunity is a gift. Wasn't it Glinda the Good Witch who said that? It was either Glinda or Dr. Phil, I can't remember.

During my short stay here in the mary old land of Oz, I've had the good fortune to work with talented, wonderful, fearless writers, who have inspired me, challenged me, made me laugh uncontrollably, and yes, occasionally worked my last good nerve. I wouldn't trade that for the world. It's been an absolute blast. I didn't get to know them all, but the ones I knew, I loved. Who wouldn't give up the safety and security of Kansas to hang out with a Scarecrow, a Tin Man and a Lion for awhile?

Spooky Is The Best Part of Halloween

And nobody does Spooky with the camp and cool of The Puppini Sisters. This is from their new CD out in February of 2008. Boo!

Fat Girls, Queers And Jesus

Somewhat fatigued with low-budget gay independent films that mostly rely on supernaturally perfect male bodies to lure us in, I threw in my FAT GIRLS screener expecting to fall asleep or fast forward from gratuitous nudity scene to gratuitous nudity scene. I was mightily disappointed and absolutely engaged. This is a gritty, unforgiving look at authentically damaged and far from perfect real queers struggling through adolescence in some godforsaken corner of Evangelical Land. The film, which opens in New York on November 2 at the Quad Cinema and rolls out nationally through November, is billed a comedy--but it's the kind of comedy that relies on the mess that is our lives. If you can't laugh at yourself, you might have trouble laughing at this movie.

Obeying the spoiler rule, I will say that the movie is full of surprising and very funny and often time disturbing plot twists--again, pretty much like real life. And the ending will not surprise you. It will surprise you. It may offend you. It may please you--depending on your hold on reality as opposed to having a firm belief in traditional and absurd Hollywood endings.

But like much of this flic, the ending will stay with you for days as you ponder it's political correctness vs the way things really and oftentimes work in this imperfect place we call our lives.

What I loved about this film is the lack of romantic rubbish and the veneer of glamor. Adolescence is hard and it is exponentially harder for fat girls and chubby gay boys. Finally we have a movie where the gay boys aren't' pretty and the struggle is real. Go and see this movie. It's refreshing and exciting to see a queer movie that doesn't rely on prostitution, tragedy or abs to draw you in. And no happy endings, just the next step in figuring out the plan--whatever it is.

One warning, the movie's R rating is misleading. I can't quite figure out the reason for the R rating other than to conclude that just showing gay reality is enough to offend the homophobic jerks who rate movies. If Fat Girls had been an entirely straight take on the adolescent struggle it likely would have earned a PG-13. So don't go assuming that an R rating means full frontal or even the occasional moon. There is some discussion of penis but no one is kind enough to show any.

You can read much more of my raves and rants on gay cinema by clicking here.

Brokeback Mountain: The Revolution That Wasn't

According to Entertainment Weekly, the big gay movie that changed everything apparently changed nothing.

What a shocker! You remember Brokeback, don't you? Hollywood's first gay romance, written by a heterosexual, directed by a heterosexual, starring heterosexuals...I'm sorry, what was gay about it? Well, now, after two years of waiting for the Hollywood revolution, it turns out that it ain't coming. Kind of like ENDA and the Hate Crime Bill--lot's of talk but no action. Now that's gay! Read more here.

Of course, we can still be grateful to Brokeback Mountain for giving a homophobic America a new and even more fun way to disparage the queer community. Nothing says loser like gay Brokeback.

Obama's Gospel Folly

Knowledge is power and history is knowledge. Some have compared Obama to Jack Kennedy, but Obama's latest passion for ex-gay gospel singers teaches us otherwise. Ironically, I can't find a reason to be upset about pro-gay Obama going all pro-ex-gay, willing to shake his gospel booty next to a profoundly misguided and psychologically-damaged gay man. The gay blogosphere has been all atwitter with this scandal, Obama creatively waffles, now caught between gays and evangelicals--a moronic dilemma of his own amateurish making. But for me the real concern is his Forty Days of Faith all God all the time magical mystery tour. And when you consider that the only thing that stands between queers and equality is all faith, all the time, it would seem that we're now seeing, as Ms. Lauper would say, Obama's "true colors." The other thing that concerns me is how we defile the legacy of Jack Kennedy. Students of history would understand the true cowardice of Obama and most other candidates as well. You can read the truth here. But start with this video and consider the real meaning of American, constitution-centric leadership. Dry and boring history teaches us that there is another way, a better way and that our current crop of Democrats is sadly lacking.

QueerSighted Blog Transition

Dear QueerSighted community,

As you may have noticed, changes are coming to QueerSighted. We appreciate your patience during this time of transition and we encourage you to continue enjoying the blog, galleries, message boards, chats and everything else this community has to offer. We will share more news about any upcoming changes very soon.

Thank you!

AOL Community editorial team

Kindness Is Good and Homosexuals Are Kind.

Hold the presses! This just in from the Crazy Christian Right: Kindness is good and Homosexuals are kind. I didn't make this up. It's right on their website, Dingbats For Truth About Homosexuality. Who would know more about homosexuality and truth than these fine folks? They spend nearly all their free time studying us. That's right, in between exorcisms, church pot-lucks, snake-handling and giving away their kid's college tuition to shyster TV evangelists with meth addictions, they are on "the homo" like white on rice. But, they're not just upset about our beloved Dumbledore ...

"The movement is afoot to include positive portrayals of homosexuals and the transgendered in all textbooks from kindergarten on up. I have no objections to textbooks including the important invention or discovery of a homosexual or transgender person so long as their homosexuality or transgenderism is not mentioned."

That's pretty Christian of the Dingbats for Truth. They don't mind that homosexuals are important inventors and scientists, they just don't want anyone to know about it. They won't tell you, but I will. There are so many queer scientists in Los Angeles, they have they're own website, Los Angeles Gay and Lesbian Scientists.

Guess what? We're not just good at science! And the Dingbats for Truth aren't the only Christians on the block!

QueerSighted News, Plus New Stuff You Shouldn't Miss

Readers,

This will be my final post on QueerSighted, so I want to say farewell. Thanks for reading my rants and raves, thanks for all the insightful comments and for your emails agreeing or disagreeing with the goings on here at QueerSighted.

I'm not yet sure where you can find me next, but meanwhile you can keep up with me on my MySpace page.
Until I have a new gig to tell you about, I'll use that to talk about the new-new stuff I want friends (you) to know about -- like these:

Great New Movie

'The Walker': While the overall film by legend Paul Schrader is somewhat weak, watching Woody Harrelson as a gentlemanly gay escort to Washington, D.C. society ladies is worth the price of admission, especially when the company he keeps includes these three actresses: Lauren Bacall, Lily Tomlin and Kristin Scott Thomas. Delish.

Great New Book
'Someday This Pain Will Be Useful To You,' by Peter Cameron: This is the best thing I've read all year and is possibly one of most well-written coming-of-age novels ever. It's driven by a sophisticated, urban, 18-year-old postmodern gay New Yorker who hates nearly everyone as he wrestles with being a misfit. Protagonist James is so awkward and such a smart ass that you will fall in love.

Great New CD

'The Historical Conquests of Josh Ritter,' Josh Ritter: At the risk of saying "greatest" again, there's no other way to describe the song writing abilities of this man. His new album bears this out, as have all the others that precede it. Also check out NPR's podcast of 'All Songs Considered' on iTunes to listen to the live-concert recording of his recent Washington, D.C. appearance at the 9:30 Club. If you listen to that concert, Josh will gain another fan-for-life. I'm sure of it.

Great New Show

'Dirty Sexy Money' (ABC): If you aren't watching it, start watching the most fun new TV show of the season. A team of gays is the brains behind this oddball dramedy featuring the Darling family, headed by actor Donald Sutherland. The Darlings are super rich, super screwed up and super entertaining. 'Six Feet Under'-alum Peter Krause plays the family lawyer whose job it is to clean up after them all. It also features a transgendered character, respectfully treated by the show and played by transgendered actress Candis Cayne -- who gets to make onscreen sexy time with co-star William Baldwin.

Great New DVD

TLA Video is just releasing a shiny gem starring old-fashioned sissy-galore Paul Lynde in his 1976
'Paul Lynde Halloween Special.' For sissies and the men who love them (like Richard Rothstein).


Again, it's been a pleasure.

Gayly forward,

Kenneth Hill
MySpace:
www.myspace.com/gayesteditorever

Email me at: KenHill@aol.com

Chamber of Secrets Now Open Wide



Finally! I can write something provocative without the world's tweens and teens threatening me with bodily harm. Harry Potter's headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, is gay. Gay gay gay gay gaaaaaaaaaay. And you can't flame me in the comments section because J.K. Rowling herself said so. So there.

Rowling, author of the Harry Potter novels, outed the ol' wizard when she appeared at Carnegie Hall in New York last Friday on the final stop of her U.S. book tour. "I always thought of Dumbledore as gay" was the revelation that made the audience collectively gasp--then subsequently erupt into wild applause. Responding to the enthusiastic reaction, Rowling added, "If I'd known it would make you so happy, I would have announced it years ago!"

What My Students Teach

My high school English teacher was a poet. My favorite line from one of her poems is, "I am not so old that what my students teach, I cannot learn". I always read that line from a student's perspective. Until last night, that is. All joking about old coots aside, there has been nothing in my life to age me. Not in a real sense. I have no children. My life has always been free. No alarm clocks, no nine to five. No looming retirement. I've moved so much I don't even have any old friends. Well, I have old friends, but like my old furniture, they were already old when I met them.

Last night, I had the honor of performing at an awards dinner for a local New York chapter of GLSEN, the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network. There were a dozen or so high school kids there, along with teachers, GLSEN board members and allies. Four awards were given out to community allies.

One of the award recipients said something that stuck with me. She said, "I'm honored to receive this award, but saddened that an award needs to be given to anyone for being an ally of LGBT youth." She was right of course, but I couldn't see it that way. I am indeed old enough to remember when there were no gay/straight alliances, no GLSEN's, no discussions, no community centers, no support. I wanted to give everyone in the room an award just for being there.

When I was in high school, gay was not an option. I didn't really even know any gay people until I was living in New York and went to my first gay bar. We weren't really a community, we were just a bunch of individual gay people who managed to find each other. Sometimes we were just lesbians or just gay men, and more often than not, the two groups did not intermingle. Much of the time we were separated and some of the time, we were separatists. We didn't know better. There were girl bars and boy bars, but I don't remember any T's or Q's or B's. With the exception of my own biological sisters, I don't recall having any straight allies.

I sat next to a young woman in her twenties last night. I asked her to explain her definition of "queer" to me. She said, "Queer just means different. Some queers are gay, some are gender fluid, some aren't sure exactly what they are, but they're not straight. Queer is just different, you know, whatever. We just want whatever to be OK."

I looked around the room and I saw some gay, some straight, some old, some young, some feminine, some masculine, some gender fluid and some taking gender and bending it like a pretzel. We were all together in one room.

At my table was a woman who looked to me to be in her late fifties or early sixties. I assumed she was straight. She seemed straight. She looked straight. I even worried a bit when I told a mildly racy gay joke at the table, wondering if I had made her uncomfortable.

My girlfriend who had been seated next to that woman, corrected me this morning. It seems that my new straight friend had been married for a long time, divorced her husband and was now in a relationship with her former neighbor, another woman who had also divorced her husband. They did not leave their husbands to be together. That happened later. It just happened. So, I was wrong. Whatever.

For me, last night was an awakening. For the first time I understood what the queer community was. There were sixty of us in that room. Some straight, some gay, some whatever. We were all a little bit queer and it was delightful.

Forgive this old gay coot for not understanding. I'm a bit set in my ways but I am trying. "I am not so old that what my students teach, I cannot learn". That was the last line in a poem my English teacher wrote for me thirty years ago. I now understand fully what it means.

On a personal note, I have grown to love you wonderful Queersighted readers. That's not easy for an old gay coot to say. You have made me laugh (and think) with your comments. God knows, a good laugh is hard to find. I look forward to getting to know you all better. Now, off with you, dagnabit!
(The Fairy Lady) Susan Norfleet

Proceed At Your Own Risk

Back in the winter of '05, as I was walking barefoot through five miles of snow on my way to school, my friend Huck turned to me and said, "Dick, have you read my blog?" What the F is a blog, I asked though my ice-encrusted mustache. So he told me. I was a bit confused. So you post your inner most thoughts and details of the mundane makings of your incredibly dull day and hundreds of strangers rush to read it? I hate America, I thought. First George W. Bush and now blogs? Yuck. Dumb ass country.

That night, as winter's worst raged outside the tiny window of my unheated garret, my one politically incorrect sperm whale candle flickering tentatively, I booted up my computer and explored Huck's blog. Huck is a ginger so I should have known better. Ginger's look perky but they are dull as Bush spawn. They have more freckles than brains. Within a few minutes, I realized that blogs were the non-pharmaceutical solution to insomnia. I passed out on the timber floor.

The following morning Huck and I were back on the blizzardy path to education. I made an ice ball and bashed him on the head; the blood blended well with his ginger hair and rusty freckles. "What was that for?" Huck whined. "For making me read your blog, you dimwitted idiot. What crap. Call me an elitist, but who the hell cares about your untrained Boston Terrier pup eating an old Superman comic book? Anyhow, thanks for a good night's sleep."

I could see the pain in Huck's eyes. He loved that comic. "You bitch (Huck's a fag), you think your life is more interesting than mine? " "Honey," I shot back, "the crap I took this morning is having a more interesting life than yours." So Huck challenged me. "Prove it! See how long it takes you to beat my tens of devoted readers!"

Well it took me three days. Huck's daily average hovered around 200, and by the end of the week Proceed At Your Own Risk was pushing 500. Within two months, PAYOR was averaging about 5,000 site visits per day.

Two years later, I abandoned PAYOR for AOL and QueerSighted, seduced into corporate servitude by the perky, effervescent and sexy as Hell Kenny Hill. On Monday, October 22, my birthday, I've decided to relaunch PAYOR--but be warned. PAYOR has never been and will never be SAFE FOR WORK, PAYOR will not be kind to gay bashers and comments left by homophobes, even polite ones will be rewarded with official acts of new a**hole ripping. Oh, and none of the annoying **** on PAYOR. PAYOR has always been and will be again be a place for real people in all of their glorious queerness. So please travel with me back to the risky land of PAYOR, that special part of New York City where the girls are tough and the boys are pretty.

I will rage on for as long my arthritis allows! By the way, feel free to email me with your thoughts and comments. All feedback on PAYOR 2.0 would be much appreciated!

The Week in Love



Let's lighten things up on this fine Friday, shall we? There's so much to love this week!

Don't you love it when the military accidentally recruits gays by placing more than 8,000 job listings on a gay networking website? "Whoops!" doesn't quite capture the sound of high-ranking officials crapping their pants when they found this out.

Don't you love it that Lance Bass wanted Britney Spears to be his fag hag? But nooooo, they haven't talked since that fateful night when Lancey-poo invited Britney to his bed--only to clobber her by coming out.

Don't you love it that Lance wants Justin Timberlake to be gay as much as we all do? "We thought Justin was gay because he told us he wanted to do a gay part in a movie," Lance told GQ magazine. I don't know about you, but that still gives me hope. Maybe Justin can team up with Daniel Radcliffe, who wants to go gay too! Who would top? Who would bottom? The possibilities are endless!

Bridget Loves Bernie, The Odd Couple, Guess Who's Coming To Dinner And Coffee Date

The greatest challenge associated with aging is not morbidity and mortality; it's novelty. More precisely it's the hunger for novelty, a hunger that grows increasingly difficult to satisfy. And when I was asked to review a new Logo film, Coffee Date, which premiered just this past Sunday, I found it very difficult to enjoy and report on the film with an open mind. How many times have I endured this particular story line? Coffee Date poses the prickly question: Can a heterosexual WASPy All-American hunk find love and companionship with a homosexual Latino stud sporting the perfect six-pack? It's the latest and trendy incarnation of the classic buddy movie merged with a social-consciousness raising unlikely romantic couple faced with top-of-mind social and political challenges.

Can rich Roman Catholic Bridget find love with poor Jewish Bernie? Can anal compulsive Felix survive life with Oscar the uber-slob? Can liberal Katherine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy accept their snow white daughter's marriage to intensely African-American Sidney Poitier? Can straight All-American computer programmer Todd and steamy gay Latin lover hair stylist Kelly find love, friendship and sexual compatibility?

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