While YOU were watching the world's most overpaid and overblown egos celebrate themselves at the altar of the shiny Oscar, much mischief was afoot.

Parents in a Vermont school district exposed a pro-diversity anti-bullying group as a nefarious recruitment cabal designed to sneak into schools under cover of fighting violence and abuse in order to enlist otherwise heterosexual children into the vile homosexual lifestyle. One parent noted that even if the anti-bullying group intended to protest the harassment of homosexuals, this would be an attack on freedom of religion and a good Christian's right to bash queers.

As usual none of my personal favorites walked away with Oscars. In case you were wondering my choices included MELTDOWN OF THE DIVAS starring Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears and Anna Nicole Smith, directed by Courtney Love for Best Picture; Charles Schumer for directing the Democratic victory in Congress; Ted Haggard for Best Actor; Mark Foley for Best Actress; Mary Cheney for Best Supporting Actor and Mrs. Ted Haggard for Best Supporting Actress.

40 gay bloggers walked into a bar. The first blogger started playing the rusty trombone. Well, if you don't know the rest go rent "The Aristocrats." It was the annual New York Gay Bloggers bar crawl laying waste to some of the seediest bars in town up and down the length of the East Village. For those of you who think Manhattan gay bars are stuffy and too cool for words, next time you're in town try Nowhere, Phoenix, Dick's, Big Lug, Boiler Room, Urge and that bar with the Rooster logo. Several days ago some folks were lamenting the end of Roxy, New York's grand mammy of dance clubs. She closes down on March 10 and will be demolished a week later. Yawn. When the original Saint was converted into a bank, we survived. We'll survive the death of the Roxy. In fact, this old man did some exploring on Saturday night and I can assure you that Manhattan queer late night trouble makers are alive and well (well, maybe not well.) I attended the opening festivities of New York nightlife institution Chip Duckett's new Ride, all the dancing, twinks, muscle boys, drag queens, go-go boys and club celebrities one could ever hope for--or dread. Among the celebrities sighted: Madame who was pulling a Greta Garbo and hiding behind the sweet face of Joe Kovacs-- but he couldn't fool me. I can sniff out the familiar scent of a bawdy old broad anywhere. Anyhow the place was packed with models and the kind of arrogant superficial New York beauties that make this town so special. So screw the Roxy.

Australia has been rocked by an epidemic of Lesbian Koala bears.

And finally, Dr. Denton Cox, 79, physician to Andy Warhol and John Steinbeck, was found lying naked in his Manhattan penthouse with bizarre burns covering 40% of his body. Police suspect it was the result of a gay sex ritual. Nobody knows how to party like a homo!

So how was your weekend?