Renee Gannon
Prince Gomolvilas
Arlan Hamilton
Sanford Marcus
Susan Norfleet
Back in the winter of '05, as I was walking barefoot through five miles of snow on my way to school, my friend Huck turned to me and said, "Dick, have you read my blog?" What the F is a blog, I asked though my ice-encrusted mustache. So he told me. I was a bit confused. So you post your inner most thoughts and details of the mundane makings of your incredibly dull day and hundreds of strangers rush to read it? I hate America, I thought. First George W. Bush and now blogs? Yuck. Dumb ass country.
That night, as winter's worst raged outside the tiny window of my unheated garret, my one politically incorrect sperm whale candle flickering tentatively, I booted up my computer and explored Huck's blog. Huck is a ginger so I should have known better. Ginger's look perky but they are dull as Bush spawn. They have more freckles than brains. Within a few minutes, I realized that blogs were the non-pharmaceutical solution to insomnia. I passed out on the timber floor.
The following morning Huck and I were back on the blizzardy path to education. I made an ice ball and bashed him on the head; the blood blended well with his ginger hair and rusty freckles. "What was that for?" Huck whined. "For making me read your blog, you dimwitted idiot. What crap. Call me an elitist, but who the hell cares about your untrained Boston Terrier pup eating an old Superman comic book? Anyhow, thanks for a good night's sleep."
I could see the pain in Huck's eyes. He loved that comic. "You bitch (Huck's a fag), you think your life is more interesting than mine? " "Honey," I shot back, "the crap I took this morning is having a more interesting life than yours." So Huck challenged me. "Prove it! See how long it takes you to beat my tens of devoted readers!"
Well it took me three days. Huck's daily average hovered around 200, and by the end of the week Proceed At Your Own Risk was pushing 500. Within two months, PAYOR was averaging about 5,000 site visits per day.
Two years later, I abandoned PAYOR for AOL and QueerSighted, seduced into corporate servitude by the perky, effervescent and sexy as Hell Kenny Hill. On Monday, October 22, my birthday, I've decided to relaunch PAYOR--but be warned. PAYOR has never been and will never be SAFE FOR WORK, PAYOR will not be kind to gay bashers and comments left by homophobes, even polite ones will be rewarded with official acts of new a**hole ripping. Oh, and none of the annoying **** on PAYOR. PAYOR has always been and will be again be a place for real people in all of their glorious queerness. So please travel with me back to the risky land of PAYOR, that special part of New York City where the girls are tough and the boys are pretty.
I will rage on for as long my arthritis allows! By the way, feel free to email me with your thoughts and comments. All feedback on PAYOR 2.0 would be much appreciated!
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