The Central Christian Church of Wichita, Kansas, is so excited by its upcoming Clay Aiken Christmas concert that the former American Idol contestant gets an enthusiastic mention on the front page of the church's website. "Clay has an incredible voice as well as a heart to use it for the Lord," the site declares. "You won't want to miss this exceptional concert!"

However, the National Enquirer (c'mon, you read it in the checkout line too!) and a TV station--KSN, the NBC affiliate in Wichita--have managed to obtain a very interesting letter that the church drafted in July. Apparently, in a preemptive move, the church prepared a document that denies that Clay Aiken is gay. You see, just in case anybody inquiried about the singer's sexuality, they would have a letter ready to go in order to assuage people's fears--because, you know, when people decide whether to go to a concert or not, they need to be assured that the performer is not a homo. I mean, people don't want to catch a gay singer's cooties.... WHAT?!

According to KSN, the letter affirms Aiken's Christian beliefs, states that "he doesn't drink, smoke, swear, or womanize," and cites a Rolling Stone article in which Aiken clearly asserts that he is not gay. Whew! Crisis averted!

Katharine Mcphee and I have been married for a while now, and it's like we're still on our honeymoon. It's like Sade said in that one song, "Everyday is Christmas and every night is New Year's Eve." I mean sure, it's been tough keeping our love a top secret in Hollywood (and the rest of the world), but I totally get it. This is just not the time in her career for her to go all Melissa Etheridge on her 15-year-old fans. (Yes. Yes it is.) Plus, to be honest with you--and Kat's gonna KILL me when she reads this *giggle*--the sex is so much hotter because of all of the secrecy. We make fun of our little undercover affair. Like for instance, she'll dress up as a Bond Girl sometimes, and I'll dress up as The Luckiest B*tch In the WORLD. It's basically good times 24/7.

I had to take a train ride a few days ago, so I thought it would be the perfect time to catch up on my wife's latest magazine cover story. I grabbed a copy of the most recent issue of STUFF magazine at the train station, found a comfy seat on board, sniffed the cover and got ready for what was surely going to be the best train ride EVER.

Fast forward 2.34 minutes, and I was finished reading the interview.

Ten questions?? And the "Are you McNaughty or McNice" one doesn't even count in my book. I immediately called a couple of (straight) friends (who read) to figure out what was going on. In my research I found that apparently STUFF magazine is for dudes, and apparently they don't really care about what the chick on the cover has to say about...well, anything. "It's all about the pictures," I was told.

Alright then. Fair enough. I mean no one knows more than I do that Mcphee is smokin' hot. So I understand. You gotta sell 'papes. So I do recommend you guys go to the newsstand, flip through the mag and see all of the extremely, ridiculously hot photos of her. And if you want to read the "article," you can right now at www.StuffMagazine.com

But if you want to know what Katharine's wife prefers when it comes to Mcphee showin her *stuff* on magazine covers, check out this vid:


Aw. Once again, my wife's personality and true beauty shine through. That's my baby girl. It's OK to be jealous of us. Why wouldn't you be? If you want to see more footage of her--and you should want to--click here. And yes, she often sings "Strong Enough" to me while I'm falling asleep. It's what we do.

(Dis' claimer: For the people who are just joining my insanity (and cause AOL said I had to say this) Katharine Mcphee and I are not really married. That'd be crazy wouldn't it.....cause everyone knows that gay marriage isn't allowed in California yet. So we're just in a common-law arrangement until the courts recognize our love. P.S. I'm so getting fired. ;-) )

Obviously ,words are very powerful things. Nappy ho, dirty Jew and faggot have crushed celebrity careers over the past year. But a free press (free from government intervention but not free from corporate tyranny) under the ugly eye of Rupert Murdoch gets away with hell. For whatever reasons, Murdoch's rapidly growing media empire is waging a propaganda war against the gay community. I'm not even going to guess at his intended long term goals, but the fact is that he is one of the primary contributors to the pervasive mainstream belief that queers are second class human beings who are easy targets for demeaning jokes, double entendres and outright slander. Murdoch's media properties are clearly encouraged to lie, inflame and defame as often and in as many ways as possible. There are too many consistencies to think otherwise.

Delicious rumors abound that Kelly Clarkson is a big old lesbo. When I heard this, I just had to get to the bottom of it and find out what's driving the sudden gay attention. It turns out, it's much a-gay about nothing.

Kelly Clarkson was recently photographed in an amazing gender-bending look complete with mullet-esque fauxhawk in the July issue of Elle magazine (seen above). In the article, Clarkson says:

"My point of view is that I shouldn't be a mother at all, because I'd be horrible. I'm not willing to be that selfless. I'm not keen on marriage. I don't let many people in. Men come and go. Friends are what I care about. And I'm fine with [seeing unflattering paparazzi shots of herself]. I just don't care. I don't wear makeup in public. I don't worry about what I'm wearing."

The gossip bloggers have then taken this information and run with it, like Jonathan, who proclaims Kelly's gayness here. Or Popcrunch.com who has run the headline: Kelly Clarkson In An Accused Lesbian. First of all, murderers are accused, Lesbians are invited to be lesbian by God herself. Secondly, if saying you aren't keen on marriage, don't want kids and don't wear makeup makes you a lesbian than saying you don't support the war and hate Bush must make you a terrorist. You can explain that to all the gorgeous, single feminists who are straight (and the hippies who are pacifists).

Gossip bloggers can't come up with enough original content for their blogs to generate traffic so instead they

When asked "boxers or briefs?" one of them answers "boxer briefs."

The other? Commando.

Can you guess who wears what? Yes, I'm picturing it all right now.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to take the rest of the afternoon off.

Watch Behind the Scenes -- Top 6
(The good part is at 1:17 minutes, FYI)



Thanks to QueerSighted superfans Shayne and Miss P for sending. Smooch.

-- UPDATE May 17: Melinda's Gone? Why Jordin Shouldn't Win But Probably Will
-- See All My 'Idol' Reviews

As we plod through American Idol with lame gay jokes from Seacrest and Cowell and my friend Kenny doomed to desperate trolling for scraps of manufactured gay-like moments, the 2007 EuroVision Song Contest delivers more Queerness than George Michael in a public men's room. Am I jealous? You bet your flaming lavender party favors I am. Check out these two entries from the current 2007 EuroVision Song competition and then join me in spitting on American Idol and its incredibly boring and pompous celebration of itself. The first video is the British semi-finalist and the second is the Danish semifinalist.

(After the break, I've thrown in a little Austrian schlagobers...a third video that has nothing to do with EuroVision but needs to be seen. Also, thanks to a reader's comment I dug up the French version of American Idol, Nouvelle Star 2007 and found Julien and his jazz version of "Like A Virgin". Randy, Paula and Simon are always hungry for those Idol contestants who have the creativity and style to make any song "their own." Julien easily demonstrates this as no other ever has. The French judges agree and can't stop raving.)